I’ve always found cliches to be the philosophy of the nitwit. People who lack the intelligence to explain life in their own words seem to lean on cliches to make themselves feel like they have some deeper insight. They are almost always the verbal ambrosia of unoriginal simpletons.
I can’t stand it when I have to admit a cliche perfectly describes something in my life, but that’s exactly what happened yesterday evening when me and Cathy went to take a look at the house we had interest in. The cliche is “If something seems too good to be true, it probably is.”
The house itself wasn’t all that awful, it would have probably been a little smaller than our current house, but it wasn’t a bad little house. The neighborhood was what killed my enthusiasm. It was ghetto meets Redneck Riviera, a bizzare and ultimately very unappealing combination.
Maybe the best thing to do is perform a massive facelift to our current house, the way they did to Yankee Stadium in the 70’s. I could stand living with my folks for a while if they’d let us, and I know Cathy has already said she was agreeable to a full makeover of our home rather than a move. Mostly I think some sort of new start, even if it’s in the same house, is what we need. Sometimes life gets stuck on a chapter after the story has kind of lost direction, and the writer has to find it within himself to start at a new point in the tale.
I really want Cathy to be happy with our home, but I know that it will take some incredible generosity and patience from the people I love to be able to pay for it and not have to live on the sidewalk during the renovations. Let’s make a deal…I’m willing to give all of you perfect attendance at family functions and as many smarmy posed pictures of me holding small children as you can stand.
At least I got to come home after the disappointment over the house and see a Yankees victory. Alex Rodriguez and Jorge Posada hit back to back home runs, and they avoided being swept by the Royals. This weekend will be the first series of the year against Boston, which is always a big deal. I don’t get quite as riled up about the Red Sox series as most fans of both teams do. I think a lot of it has to do with with MLB’s ridiculous unbalanced schedule which matches up division rivals a whopping six series per regular season. The games against the Mets are more enjoyable to me, but that’s just me. ESPN acts like every Yankees-Red Sox game is the most important baseball game ever played. Both teams are playing pretty mediocre ball in this very very early part of the season, but that hasn’t stopped the ESPN hype machine from doing their best to whip the masses into a frenzy about these games which ultimately, are like any other games in the season’s opening month. But yeah, I’ll definitely watch them.
Once, my mom asked me if I would be willing to just watch every Yankees game of the season and basically only do other stuff on days the team wasn’t playing.
“Is this your first day? Yeah, of course!” I answered.
Watching the Yankees last night, I couldn’t help but think ahead to what should be a very interesting and busy off-season after the ‘08 season ends. Several massive contracts will be coming off the books, including the absurd contract of Jason Giambi, whose swing now looks like its taking place underwater. Other big expiring contracts include Andy Pettitte, Bobby Abreu, and Mike Mussina. If the Yankees are smart, something they aren’t always, Abreu will be the only one they consider signing to a new contract, and the team should wait and see how this season goes even for him. Mussina and Pettitte have been very good pitchers, and Mussina is a borderline Hall of Fame candidate, although I doubt he will ever make it. But the team will have to resist its usual urge to give in to the perceived virtues of veteran pitchers, and allow both to go elsewhere.
Looking even further ahead, more big contracts will be coming to an end after the’09 season. Johnny Damon, Hideki Matsui, and the embarrassingly foolish whopper of a contract the team showered on world class jackass and tape measure home run supplier to the American League, middle reliver Kyle Farnworth(less). Yankee fans know that Farnsworthless running to the mound is the team’s symbolic raising of a white flag of surrender. Never has a Yankee pitcher with such velocity had so little ability to consistently get outs. Rumor is that his teammates are less than enamored with him as well. If the team could get an organization with a notoriously naive weak spot for mediocre bullpen pitchers (are you listening, Cincinnati Reds?) to take him for even a low level, low ceiling prospect, they should move him immediately and spend the rest of the day breakdancing.
I’ve always been a fan of Johnny Damon, but from a strictly baseball standpoint, I hope they don’t try to extend his contract. His already weak throwing arm has become old-lady-like, and his hitting has declined after a solid first year in the Bronx. He seems like a really cool dude, and he plays hard, but I don’t think he’s worth an extension at his current salary. With Matsui, in the interest of disclosure, I am a HUGE fan of his and therefore undoubtedly biased as a fan, but I would like to see him extended. He is worth whatever the team pays him just in the enormous quantity of Yankee hats and shirts the team sells in Japan because of him, but beyond that, he’s a solid, reliable, professional who has produced at consistent levels of offense since he stepped on the field at the big ballpark in the Bronx. Guys you can count on are rare in any profession, and reliability is a skill, believe it or not. I hope Matsui will spend many more years on the team and ultimately have his number 55 retired in Monument Park.
Tags: asperger, baseball, Hideki Matsui, new york yankees
